THE INSTANT BOOK NIGHTMARE!

It was a jaw-dropping moment, straight out of Goldilocks and The Three Bears!

But it wasn’t bears who had entered my property. Due to “Instant Book” on a rent — your — home website, some intoxicated individuals had rented my upstairs loft room — INSTANTLY! But since they were too drunk to climb the stairs, they simply moved about 24 suitcases and 100 bags filled with clothing and other debris into all of my downstairs rooms, while I was happily at a girlfriend’s birthday party.

I came home to the surprise.

Their stuff populated every area. I was so flabbergasted that I was stuttering. “What is this?” is all I could manage to utter. “We live here,” one of the three stooges replied in slurred speech. One of them had already urinated on the couch.

After sorting it out with the police and the host company, they were finally OUT. The police spent more than two hours moving all of their worldly goods out of my home.

The police did a marvelous job, I must say. They played the classic roles of “Good Cop/Bad Cop.” The younger one stayed close to me and continuously whispered and assured me, “Don’t worry. They’re leaving!” While the older cop agreed with everything the drunks were saying, just to keep them calm.

“She’s a SCAM! I’m gonna report her to the EEOC!” one bellowed.

“I think you should do that!” the cop replied, as he moved more debris out of my house.

Somehow, during the exodus process, the vagabonds also confiscated five packages of gourmet cheese out of my refrigerator.

Needless to say, I no longer permit “Instant Book.” ~Angela Woodhull